You might want to put down whatever you're eating right now.
Maybe slime crunching and fazura lucahmukbang feasts just don't give you that tingle down your spine anymore. Maybe you've stopped experiencing that sweet, sweet wave of self-disgust after watching a juicy pimple popping video. Maybe you've just become too desensitized to the horrors of bodily ASMR for anything to simultaneously disturb and satisfy you.
SEE ALSO: This exfoliating mitten makes my skin feel like a damn cloudLet me introduce you to the repulsive, inexplicably fulfilling world of dandruff scratching.
If your ASMR-hungry mind craves something more depraved that bursting cysts or earwax removal, watching someone scratch skin flakes off of their scalp may be just what you're looking for.
These videos, as disgusting as they are, are wildly popular. The channel "Scratching My Scalp Off" has more than 19,000 subscribers and their first video has nearly 1.9 million views.
Medical professionals strongly advise against scratching dandruff because irritating an already inflamed patch of skin can only make it worse. But that hasn't stopped may people, knowing how lucrative ASMR videos can be. According to SocialBlade, Scratching My Scalp Off can bring in $3,300 to $52,600 per year. Although that's a vast range, dealing with chronically flaky hair doesn't seem so bad if it means an extra thousand dollars here and there.
As the Cut points out, channels "publicize their intimate scratching by flake size," like this video called "Husband films DANDRUFF SCRATCHINIG - HUGE SCALES behind my ears!"
Using a fine tooth comb, the woman in the video picks at her roots to remove the desired dandruff. Like pastry flaking off of a toasted buttery croissant, or snow falling over an idyllic country village, the irritated skin crumbs fall gracefully away from her scalp with ease.
Other YouTubers prefer to film up close.
This video, for example, was filmed under a microscope to show every hair follicle being freed of their skin flake prison and is inexplicably set to Tchaikovsky's iconic "Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy."
Much like the principle ballerina who dances the Sugar Plum Fairy in "The Nutcracker," the dandruff seems to float and dance off this unfortunate person's scalp!
Like many ASMR videos, the effect is best experienced with your volume turned all the way up.
This particular version had limited BIG FLAKES (to use the dandruff community's lingo) but does feature lots of satisfying scratching sounds as the dandruff seeker gently pokes at the subject's scalp to coax off those precious skin flakes.
At least they're wearing gloves in this one.
If watching toenail removals and navel stone extractions doesn't scratch that itch for you, maybe dandruff videos can (literally) do the trick.
But please, for the love of ASMR, don't try this at home.
OBITUARY: Mas Fujimoto, 92; Longtime Koyasan Troop 379 Scout Leader
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